Cigarette Warnings

Today A federal judge blocked a U.S. rule requiring tobacco companies to display graphic images on cigarette packs, such as a man exhaling cigarette smoke through a hole in his throat.

U.S. District Judge Richard Leon sided with tobacco companies and granted a temporary injunction, saying they would likely prevail in their lawsuit challenging U.S. health regulators' rule as unconstitutional because it compels speech in violation of the First Amendment.

But what if the warnings were not so graphic; but still had an impact?

"I SMOKE THESE"

Maybe a picture of the celebrity skank known as Lindsay Lohan saying she smokes them would deter potential smokers?

"EVERY SMOKE MAKES ME MORE FAMOUS"

Or Justin Bieber's fame rising because you smoke a cigarette could deter millions of people from lighting up.

"SMOKE THEM I'M A DOCTOR"

How about the infamous Dr. Conrad Murray saying it is OK to smoke? Surely a recommendation from a doctor that famously screwed up basic CPR should be enough to get people to quit?

The warnings on cigarettes don't have to be graphic - they just have to have reverse endorsements.

The Jurors Speak

With the weekend being the only time that the jurors, in the Conrad Murray trial, can actually take a break in thinking about the trial; it seemed like a great time to get them all in one room. The alcohol started flowing; and the jurors opened up.

Legal Notice: Details may have been fabricated, omitted, or altered for legal purposes. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

MJHDC: So how is deliberations going?
Juror 1: Not good, it is taking forever. Juror 5 had diarrhea on Friday and we ended up taking more breaks than necessary ...
Juror 5: Hey, not my fault. I still say it was the chicken from the court cafeteria that caused it.
Juror 8: Well I had the chicken and it didn't effect me in any way.
Juror 5: Aren't you just special then.
Juror 4: I had a bit of an icky stomach and I had the chicken.
Juror 9: The beef was fine.
MJHDC: OK. Back to the trial. How has the medical evidence played a part in your deliberations?
Juror 7: It didn't. Not in mine any way. They totally lost me. I don't know if it was 25mg or the whole bottle.
Juror 11: Yeah. It was hard to keep up with all the experts.
Juror 10: It wasn't what they were saying it was just how they were saying it.
Juror 2: I'll agree with that. It was bad enough listening to Walgren and Chernoff. And then these so-called experts got on the stand. I was just about ready to blow my own brains out.
Juror 12: Some it did seem a bit in-depth. And how we are meant to understand it all is just crazy.
Juror 3: Its all a fucking hoax. You know that?
MJHDC: Well it is a possibility; that is for sure. So Juror 3 you believe?
Juror 3: Of course. I'm here for the free lunches and a bit of free time away from work and the family. I have 5 kids. Any break I can get I take.
Juror 5: Well if you don't think Michael Jackson is dead how do you intend to come to a verdict.
Juror 3: Not guilty. Dumbass. Its obvious if MJ is alive then Murray is innocent.
MJHDC: So are you allowed to discuss if you have taken any votes yet?
Juror 12: We took a vote as soon as we went in the room. It was 4 for guilty and 7 for not guilty ...
MJHDC: That is only 11.
Juror 12: Well Juror 5 was in the bathroom and wouldn't shout his answer through the door.
MJHDC: I see. Is it still that way now you have had a day of deliberations?
Juror 4: We don't know. We haven't had a vote since.
MJHDC: Well how about now, a quick show of hands? All those that think Conrad Murray is guilty raise your hand. OK that is 3 of you.
Juror 6: What we voting on?
MJHDC: Whether you think Murray is guilty at the present moment.
Juror 6: Oh sorry. I thought it was about who had the chicken still. I don't think Murray is guilty.
Juror 5: Nice going Janice.
Juror 6: Tom I didn't think we were allowed to mention names.
Juror 5: I'm sure he'll edit all that out at the end.
MJHDC: Yeah. Sure; if I remember.
Juror 5: See.
Juror 6: OK then. Well I really liked how Walgren composed himself in the closing argument. If I wasn't a married woman ...
Juror 4: Janice you are not married.
Juror 6: Yes I am. Just because we have never met doesn't mean we can't be married.
Juror 5: Oh for fucks sake. Crazy bitch is never getting married. Lets be honest about it. She spent 15 minutes at lunch yesterday lining her garden peas up on her plate.
Juror 6: Well they did look neater. You know I hate mess.
Juror 5: Yeah you are the only one who took notes in chronological order. Me I just winged it and hoped I could copy off someone at the end.
MJHDC: Sticking to the trial. A lot has been said about Propofol. Anyone ever had it before?
Juror 3: Me. Had it when I came back from the Gulf.
MJHDC: So you was in the Gulf war?
Juror 3: No way. It was a vacation before all this war stuff kicked off. Anyway I drunkenly fell off the balcony at the hotel. Broke my arm and cracked 2 ribs; and had a major gash on my head. They did some exploratory surgery and then it was when I had the Propofol. Well I think it was Propofol it is all a bit hazy.
MJHDC: This discussion isn't breaking Judge Pastor's guidance of not discussing the trial is it?
Juror 12: I don't think so. We only get paid Monday to Friday. So I think as along as it is the weekend we are alright to talk about it.
Juror 9: Do we get a lunch break?
MJHDC: You have been here for 20 minutes. So no.
Juror 9: What about a break?
Juror 1: That has what it has been like all the time. We just start talking and someone wants to do something.
Juror 4: We might head over to Carolwood Drive on Monday. I think as the jury we can ask for little trips to look at the scene.
MJHDC: Sort of. If it is relevant I think you can.
Juror 4: See I told you we could.
MJHDC: I wouldn't take my answer as the final answer.
Juror 3: I'm taking a camera. The only believer on the jury. Be a feather in my cap so to speak.
Juror 6: You don't wear a cap.
Juror 3: It is a figure of speech.
Juror 7: What will we learn from seeing Michael Jackson's bedroom?
Juror 3: Who gives a shit. At least we will be there. I'm wearing my fedora on Monday just in case.
MJHDC: Finally, before I wrap this up, I'd like to ask each of you for your opinion on how the trial went.
Juror 1: I was bored through most of it. Most of my notes are covered in little doodles.
Juror 2: I'd rather not say.
Juror 3: Boring. Boring. And even more boredom. I know MJ is alive so why go through this show?
Juror 4: Its been pretty exciting compared to my normal work. I have 17 cats you know.
MJHDC: I'm sure you do.
Juror 5: At least I'm getting paid for sleeping. And I did get the phone number of Ms Brazil. Result.
Juror 6: I think it has been very enlightening and we are going to be diligent in our deliberations.
Juror 5: Sure we are. Heads he is guilty. Tails he is innocent.
Juror 7: I don't know right now what is going on. Someone shouted 'murderer' at me last night. I got scared.
MJHDC: So, people know who you all are then?
Juror 7: It is a bit obvious. We all leave court wearing our 'juror number badge' so it didn't take them too long to work it out.
Juror 8: He's guilty and I'm going to recommend lethal injection.
MJHDC: Thats not possible. He'll do a maximum of 4 years by California sentencing guidelines.
Juror 8: Well we might as well let him go with the other 30,000 criminals they are releasing then.
Juror 9: Is Lindsay Lohan going to jail? I'm not allowed to watch the news.
MJHDC: Maybe. After she has posed for Playboy. She'll be in overnight and out the next morning.
Juror 10: She's nothing but a skank ho. I'd rather see Betty Ford naked.
MJHDC: Betty Ford is dead.
Juror 10: You got a problem with that?
Juror 11: I'm hoping it all ends soon. I think I am getting sores on my butt from sitting so much. I don't know how the judge does it all the time.
Juror 12: I say we go back Monday and just say "Not guilty" and get it all over with. Aint nobody going to have him as a doctor now anyway.
MJHDC: True that.
Juror 5: Its a fucking hoax. I tried explaining the ambulance picture to you; and the whole Robert Earl Carter connection.
Juror 7: Not that again.
MJHDC: Well you obviously have more to talk about. So good luck on Monday. And about 3.30PM if you could make your announcement I have a little bet going. Thanks.

After this discussion had taken place the jurors all left for their own lives. For legal reasons Janice's real name of Susan, and Tom's real name of Jason, were never mentioned.

Two-Faced Justice

Yesterday as Conrad Murray left the court some of the 'Justice4MJ' people were heard shouting "Murray is a murderer". Well, actually they were chanting it as he left.

So what the hell are they going to do if the guy is found innocent by 12 jurors?

They going to say that the decision is wrong? They going to complain there is no justice in the justice system? Or are they actually going to think before they start chanting their judgemental bullshit outside the court?

Let us take a little trip down memory lane, back to 2005, when Michael Jackson was acquitted of all charges.

Michael Jackson was indicted for four counts of molesting a minor, four counts of intoxicating a minor in order to molest him, one count of attempted child molestation, and one count of conspiring to hold the boy and his family captive at his 2,700-acre Neverland Ranch, as well as conspiring to commit extortion and child abduction. On June 13, 2005, the jury found Michael Jackson not guilty on all fourteen charges, which included all of the above plus four lesser-included misdemeanor counts.

So the question remains: Are these people that have promoted themselves to Judge, Jury, and executioner for Conrad Murray really going to say that there was a miscarriage of justice? Because the way I see it - If it is good enough justice to prove Michael Jackson innocent; no matter what the outcome it must also be good enough for Conrad Murray.

The 12 jurors are just ordinary people, like you and me, that have no specific medical training in the 'Propofol' area; and are working with the evidence and facts that were presented in the court room. As Judge Pastor said yesterday; this is the only evidence and facts they may use in reaching their decision. And to be honest, the whole 'medical expert' testimonies confused the hell out of me; but I see it from both sides.

Yes Murray was employed, although he never got paid, to care for Michael Jackson. But if the whole theory for the prosecution is that Murray set up a Propofol drip; and there is no tube for that then a question remains: Why did Murray leave everything else and just take one tube.

And that is going to be one of the many questions that the jury will be discussing I'm sure. And if they can't find a reason for Murray to take one item and leave everything else connected with the alleged Propofol IV drip it leaves reasonable doubt. And as such they cannot find him guilty of the charge of involuntary manslaughter without a shadow of a doubt.

So will the 'Justice4MJ' people forget that 12 jurors gave Michael Jackson an innocent verdict and they agreed with that just because the justice system may do the same to Conrad Murray?

I'm not advocating the justice system is perfect. Far from it. But at the same time it has to be said if it is good enough for one it is good enough for another. Yes mistakes are are made but at the same time it is not a time to become two-faced and say it is good enough for one and not the other.

It reminds me of the old saying "What is good for the goose is good for the gander."

The Hoaxer's Halloween

The following story is fictional. All people, places, and situations bearing any resemblance to real life, persons living or dead, is purely coincidental.

It was the night before Halloween, Devil's Night to some, but to the various hoaxers, and believers, around the world it was the third night in which believers were being killed off.

Two days ago, in California, a prolific believer had been killed. Local police had chalked the murder up to just another senseless killing; but any believer who saw the crime scene knew something more had taken place.

When Twiggy was discovered. She was tied to her bed; her naked body seemingly punctured over and over again by a knife. Blood soaked the sheets. If that was all the details believers might also feel it was just another senseless murder. But there was clues that police had overlooked - because to them the clues meant nothing. All over the wall, written in blood, was the phrase "7x7x7". There was a single white glove found on the floor. The police did a complete sweep of the room - no fingerprints, no DNA, no nothing as evidence.

The local police, in California, said it was a killing, that although strange, appeared to be random and would unlikely be repeated. As far as they were concerned it was another murder that would go unsolved.

Yesterday in Newcastle, England, another believer was killed. The body of Henda had been found hanging in an abandoned warehouse. Hanging from the beam was Henda. His body had slowly dripped every fluid ounce of blood to the floor below. Yet again another killing. Local media said that the police were confused by the scene but were unlikely to solve this murder.

The scene was later described by the local news. Henda had been hanging, his blood slowly leaving his body as he died a slow, painful, death. Police found a single white glove; although there was no message this time. No message until the blood was cleaned up that is. As the blood was washed from the floor, below Henda was a circular message - a calling card. It read "7x7x7x7x7x7x". Once again there was no evidence. No fingerprints. Nothing.

The rumors were already starting on Twitter. Someone was going around the world killing believers. But who could be doing such a thing. Who could be creating these horrible murder scenes without leaving the police so much as a single strand of evidence to work with?

Then it happened. As soon as the news broke it was all over Twitter. Souza, the administrator of a hoax forum, had been killed. Details were sketchy to say the least. All that was known is that Souza had been murdered. Yet another believer killed. The scene was later described: Souza had been in the kitchen. Someone took a knife and cut her throat. Then they cut off her arms; then her legs. She had died screaming in pain. Once again there was a single white glove. There was also the message of "7x7x7" carved into her torso. No evidence was found.

It was the next day, Halloween, believers worldwide were worried that one of them was going to be next. Three people had died and it would most likely happen again tonight. But who was it to be? Butterflies400 checked her direct messages on Twitter - one stood out:

Happy Halloween Hoaxers!

Wake Up The Trial Is Almost Over

The Conrad Murray trial is all but over. And what have we learned from it all? Medical experts chosen as witnesses seem to be one step away from comatose. They are possibly the most boring people in the entire world.

Michael Jackson didn't need Propofol - he should of just paid these people to sit in his room and start them talking. He'd of been asleep in seconds and would have stayed asleep for hours while these boring bastards discussed the various details of IV bags, Propofol, and other things.

This is possibly the trial of the decade. The current generations OJ Simpson trial and it is full of boring people with about as much personality as roadkill.

Judge Michael Pastor has tried to inject a little bit of life with the occasional joke or smart remark. But that has not been enough to counter the likes of Flanagan, Chernoff, White, and Shafer who have made it a personal mission to send the jurors to sleep.

Why couldn't Jim Carrey be a Propofol expert? Anybody but the boring people they paraded in court. It could have all been so different:

Chernoff: And your name for the record is?
Witness: Dr Who.
Chernoff: Who?
Witness: No, not really, it is Dr James Steele, I just always wanted to use the Dr Who line.
Chernoff: Umm OK. And you are an expert in Propofol?
Wtiness: Yes I am. I can get you some seems your boy there can't order it anymore.
Chernoff: No, that is not what I meant.
Witness: Well you need to be clearer then.
Chernoff: So can you describe ...
Witness: Wait. I got one for you. Two nuns walk into a bar and order Propofol ...
Judge: Whoa there. Now is not the time.
Witness: Just trying to lighten the mood.
Judge: Its a very serious matter.
Witness: That is what the bartender said to the nuns.
Chernoff: Objection.
Judge: Overruled I've heard that one before it is what the bartender says.

Nobody cares how many milligrams of Propofol it takes to put a piglet butt to sleep. Nobody cares what Dr White had to say. The trial has been a let down. So no matter what the outcome of the trial it may go down in history as one of the most boring 'celebrity' trials ever.

You know it is a boring trial when the highlight has been a pumpkin, an elephant, and Murray's hooker girlfriend showing up with her dollar store weave looking like she just finished a shift at 'Jiggles' strip club.