Michael Jackson Is Dead

Yes, you read the title correctly; and no you didn't just wake up in 2009.

Many believe that Michael Jackson faked his death on June 25, 2009. But two and half years later it is difficult to see it still as some kind of hoax; or game.

Let us be honest here, for a while, no matter what your belief in the situation is and admit that dying has been good business for Michael Jackson and the whole Jackson family.  According to the prosecution in the Conrad Murray case Michael Jackson would have made approximately $100 million. And since his death, up to June 2011, he, or his estate depending on your view, has earned over $1 billion.

So with profits like that it is no wonder Michael Jackson may have faked his death. But whether he did or did not is beside the point.

Looking at a couple of the theories that exist that suggest Michael Jackson faked his death; nothing adds up.

Death threats is one reason that is always thrown in to the pot as to why Michael Jackson may have faked his death. But that was two and a half years ago. If the threat hasn't gone by now it never will and therefore if he did fake his death he is never going to come out of hiding.

Witness Protection is another option that is always put out when considering Michael Jackson hoaxed his death. Two and a half years of protection for what? Witness protection is so you can testify against some major crime. That hasn't happened.

And the final option is that Michael Jackson faked his death to simply cash in and clear his debts. Well, if that is the case he better never come back because there is going to be a ton of pissed off people that would most likely mean his next death is not faked.

So, as I see it, and it is just my opinion, Whether Michael Jackson faked his death or not he may as well be dead because he is never coming back.

Christmas Is Here

Well, in actual fact it is just around the corner. And with that in mind is it time to start ending various things that are in the world.

Let us start with the fur trade. What sort of person really wants to wear the fur of an animal that was slaughtered just so they can get a nice fur lining on some piece of clothing? I mean, 50 years ago, the Nazis were making lampshades out of human skin and were classed as barbarians. What really gives mankind the right to slaughter an animal just for its fur? I mean the leather industry is fine - as McDonalds is going to make sure all the cows get killed any way so it is more of a by-product. But there is nobody eating an angora rabbit burger. Anyone seen wearing fur, fake or real, deserves to be covered in red paint.

Next; the Jehovah Witnesses. What the hell sort of Christian religion does not celebrate Christmas? Seriously, It is because Jesus was allegedly born in the Summer and therefore December is the wrong month. But does it matter if you celebrate the birth of the saviour of mankind in July or December? Surely as God-fearing Christians celebrating his son's birth is a good thing. These miserable bastards won't even celebrate their own birthday. Why not? Is it such a bad thing to celebrate Jehovah keeping you alive one more year? Even the Amish celebrate birthdays and them poor bastards have no electric, telephone, or television.

Movie remakes. Why? And who gets paid for these? It is not like anybody had to actually do any thinking. Just watch a movie from the seventies or eighties and shoot it again with different actors. But it isn't just that movie remakes are pointless; they are never as good as the original. The Omen, first created in 1976, and then remade in 2006 is a prime example of why movies should not be remade. The original was a horror based on atmosphere and suspense. The remake was an abortion in comparison; it totally lost the point of the original. A Nightmare On Elm Street is another great example. The original from 1984, starring Robert Englund, was a classic. Then in 2010 they remake it, without Robert Englund, without the wit and sarcasm of Freddy, and they just ruin it. They even spend nearly 15 minutes proving that Freddy was burned alive for being a pedophile. Nobody cares why Freddy was burned alive. It is not real; otherwise Freddy would of died in the fire.

Governments. What is the point? Governments do nothing but waste money and fuck things up. Looking at the U.S. you have two federal departments BCP (Border & Customs Patrol) and ICE (Immigration & Customs Enforcement) doing the same job by their department names. If BCP are patrolling the borders and doing customs surely they don't need ICE doing customs too? Its an overlap; it is a reason to throw money away. And by the media reports neither department is doing that great at what they are meant to be doing. If the government was a company that actually answered to shareholders and the like it would have been liquidated years ago. There is so much overlap in the U.S. government that nobody is doing anything because they all think someone else in a different department is doing their job. And it isn't just the U.S. government; the U.K. government is closing Unemployment Offices while unemployment rises. Shows just how much the government know, and care, when the people who need them get shafted. And then these politicians wonder why they only last 4 years in office.

People pretending to be homeless. And we are not talking about Homeless Dave who is a mere character. We are talking about the scum that go out on a daily basis pretending to be homeless and begging for cash from strangers. It is time for these fuckers to be arrested and charged for fraud. Because some people give to these fakes and then the real homeless people, the ones that really need help, miss out. These fake homeless people are worse than prostitutes; at least when you see a prostitute on the street you know she really is a prostitute and not some con artist who is only pretending to have sex for cash. And for those wondering you can usually tell the prostitutes by the way they walk - just imagine John Wayne.

Criminals. Nearly everyone at some time breaks the law. But you have a select that continually break the law and are in and out of jail and prison their whole life. There should be a cut-off point. Break the same law three times and you are executed in a public place while the public look on. Watch the crime rate drop.

Political correctness has to go. You can't say anything without offending someone. You can't say Merry Christmas because you may offend someone who doesn't celebrate. You cant say people are fucking stupid you have to be polite and say they are mentally challenged. Sorry, but if the worse thing that happens in your life is that someone says you are fucking stupid - your life will be fine without a bunch of soft bastards worried that someone may actually say what they think.

Christmas may be the season to be jolly but under no terms does it say it is the season we give up the right to think and say what we think.

I'm going to end this post with a famous Christmas quote: "Bah! Humbug."

Question Everything

If you were one of the few that started this long, long, journey back in 2009 you are 2 years in on a journey that may never end - kind of like a Mr Magoo Mystery tour.

But just because it may never end does not mean people should stop questioning things.

OK. That is the safe version over. So anyone easily offended may want to leave right now as it is about to go old school MJHDC.

What the fuck are some of these ignorant fuckers thinking? Following dumbass wannabe basement dwellers like mjviva on Twittter like they really are Michael Jackson; or when their story changes that they are in contact with Michael Jackson at the very least. And to avoid the whole retarded "mjviva never said they were MJ" shit from these dumb fucks that think mjviva is on the level I'll embed the video here with mjviva's tweets in it. So if you want to fucking complain that mjviva never said they were Michael Jackson - watch the video, go back read their fucking tweets and then decide if you want to look like a retarded abortion by defending the statement that "mjviva never said they were MJ".




As far as I am aware Katherine Jackson is not some mad scientist that has been cloning her children in the basement. How many fucking Michael Jacksons are people going to follow? Come on, there can only be one Michael Jackson.

I'm now going to name some people that you may or may not have heard of. These people were around at the beginning and may, or may not, still be investigating the hoax in their own way - AnnaK, Ghostie, Eternal, Tee, Souza, and many more. These people, along with countless others, put in the work at the beginning. Questioning every little detail. Questioning anyone who even hinted at knowing something. Tore apart every statement looking for the truth. Uncovered many details and many people claiming to be something they are not.

(Yes it pained me to include Souza. But in all seriousness her and Mo were damn good investigators in this whole hoax before they went off the rails. So credit where credit is due.)

But that was back then. Now is a bit different. Now people will believe anything and everything that some fuck throws their way. What has mjviva ever proven?

Did mjviva say they were Michael Jackson? Yes.


Did mjviva call the trial result? No.


Did mjviva say MJ would return in November or December? Yes.


Did mjviva then change that prediction to no comeback? Yes.

So over 1000 retarded waste of semen want to believe that shit and follow mjviva? Go ahead. But don't drag me into the same retarded world.

Do I believe? Sort of; there is some doubt. Do I want to be labeled a believer? Fuck no. Because to be honest, right now the believers are looking like a bunch of abortions with 1 brain cell shared among them. And the good news is that it is going to get worse and worse. Because any bored person who wants a bit of attention is going to pretend to be Michael Jackson on Twitter, Facebook, or Google+.

So in a few months time George W. Bush would leap over 300 burning believers to put Alex Jones out. And remember when that day comes you all created it by allowing.

But that is just a possibility. The future can be changed. Start questioning every little thing. Start asking people that are giving cryptic tweets to be clear. Make them answer clear 'yes or no' questions. If they won't answer with a clear answer, rather than the usual cryptic bullshit, you can pretty much guess they are hiding something - and it isn't Michael Jackson.

The vast majority I have seen involved in looking at the hoax have shown they are smarter, more intelligent, than the current state of the hoax. So now is either the time to prove it or go down in history as a bunch of delusional wastes of oxygen that spent months believing Michael Jackson was an egg.

But, and this is an important but, don't take my word for it. Go in the archives of MJ-Kit, the archives of MJHD, and other forums. See what was happening 2 years ago. And then you'll see why, whether people believe or not, the hoax is doomed on its current path.

Open Source Software

"A method and philosophy for software licensing and distribution designed to encourage use and improvement of software written by volunteers by ensuring that anyone can copy the source code and modify it freely. The term 'open source' is now more widely used than the earlier term 'free software' (promoted by the Free Software Foundation) but has broadly the same meaning - free of distribution restrictions, not necessarily free of charge. There are various open source licenses available. Programmers can choose an appropriate license to use when distributing their programs." - The Free On-line Dictionary Of Computing

Whether you use Windows, Linux, or OSX Open Source software exists for almost anything you need to do with your computer. Creating a document or presentation - OpenOffice and LibreOffice have you covered there. Edit a photo or create a digital masterpiece - Gimp has you covered. Surf the web - Firefox and Chromium have your back. Need to edit an MP3 file - Audacity will sort you out. Need to boot your computer with an Operating System other than Windows - Ubuntu and OpenSUSE will have you running in no time.

So, without rattling Open Source software titles off without actually saying what they do, let me explain some of the vast Open Source software choices.

Operating System

Ubuntu - Possibly the most used Linux distribution for desktop and laptop computers. If you have ever installed Windows you can install Ubuntu. Its as easy as answering a few questions and then let it do its thing. (Linux)

OpenSUSE - An easy to use, fully loaded, Operating System. Again another easy install. (Linux)

Both Ubuntu and OpenSUSE come as a live CD; which means you can boot your computer from the live CD and test it without making any changes to your computer. If you like it install it. If you don't like it throw the CD away. But seriously what is not to like?

Another thing to mention is that Ubuntu and OpenSUSE are just two of many Linux distributions. The Live CD List website has a ton of information about all the live CDs that are out there to be tried.

Office Software

OpenOffice - Think of Microsoft Office now give it some features that Microsoft Office lacks. There you have OpenOffice. Database, Spreadsheet, Documents, and Diagrams it does it all. The only complaint I, personally, hear from people is that the layout is not the same as Microsoft Office. And to that the only answer is: "If you had never heard of Microsoft Office it wouldn't feel strange." Seriously, it is just laid out a bit different; but if you can use Microsoft Office you can use OpenOffice. It may just take a little bit of getting used to the menu and toolbar layouts if you previously used Microsoft Office. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

LibreOffice - Is actually a fork of OpenOffice (meaning they took the code of OpenOffice and improved it). What LibreOffice offers that OpenOffice doesn't is better handling of multimedia. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

As a sidenote there is some discussion about whether OpenOffice will remain Open Source or become Freeware (where the source code is not available). This discussion is due in part, if no wholly, because Oracle took over Sun. Personally, I have both installed as it is not like hard drives actually get full nowadays.

Graphic Software

GIMP (GNU Image Manipulation Program) - Think Photoshop. That is GIMP in a nutshell. Yes some of the features that everyone fell in love with in Photoshop are missing (such as grouped layers) but GIMP still gets the job done. Need to remove an ugly guest from a wedding photo GIMP can do it. Need to design a company logo GIMP can do it. Pretty much anything you can think of GIMP does. (Windows, Linux, Mac). And if you want the feel of Photoshop while using GIMP then take a look at GIMPshop which does exactly that. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Inkscape - Similar to Adobe Illustrator. Graphic design using vector graphics rather than bitmap graphics - which basically means they are scalable (it can be 200 pixels or 20000 pixels and still be the same quality). Web graphics, technical diagrams, icons, creative art, logos, and maps - Inkscape will work for you. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Web Browser Software

Firefox - The most popular browser at the moment. What you can you write about a web browser that has had everything written about it? Nothing; and according to statistics 38% of the people reading this are doing so in Firefox. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Chromium - Is the web browser that Google Chrome is based on. In actual fact Chrome is 99.9% Chromium with rebranding and the auto-update feature. The big difference is that Chromium is Open Source and Chrome is not; which really isn't a big difference when you think about it. My personal reason for choosing Chromium over Chrome is I want to be in charge of when my software updates. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Audio Software

Audacity - Software for recording and editing sound files. Audacity lets you mix, edit, and record sound files. Audacity also has a ton of effects (Change pitch, Remove static, hiss, hum, or other constant background noises, Alter frequencies with Equalization, FFT Filter, and Bass Boost effects, Adjust volumes with Compressor, Amplify, and Normalize effects, Echo, Phaser, Wahwah, Reverse). You can also load VST and LADSPA plugins. So get the Autotune plugin and who knows Audacity may make you the next Britney Spears or Justin Bieber. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Video Software

VLC Media Player - Originally named VideoLAN Client - is a flexible media player. VLC plays all of the common media formats both video and audio - and plays your DVDs and today's popular DivX and MPEG4 movies. Most streaming media is supported as well including Windows Media (WMV) and QuickTime. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

Game Software

FlightGear - You'll fine a wide variety of aircraft from the Wright Brothers' first airplane to modern military jets and navigate using any major brand joystick or your mouse as a yoke. In addition, you can download the whole planet or squares off the website. You can program your own graphics, create airports, new aircraft and reprogram flight controls and response to suit your preferences. The game is limited only by your imagination. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

VDrift - Is a driving simulator that is definitely different. The core of the game is 'drift' racing, based on a recent racing movie and a single driving move that is next to impossible to pull off in the real world. Still, the game has simulation-grade driving physics that make it interesting, fun and challenging for most. (Windows, Linux, Mac)

That is just a small selection of the Open Source software that is available for Windows, Linux, and the Mac. There is so much more to discover in the Open Source community. A few links are:

osalt.com - Open Source as alternative
opensourcewindows.org - Open Source Windows
opensourcemac.org - Open Source Mac

Starting Over Again

What we need to do is go back; way back. Back to June 25, 2009.

Why? Because if Michael Jackson did fake his death something prompted it. Which may answer those questions which are still lurking.

The 'why' is the most important aspect of the whole hoax. Once the 'why' has been established all the other answers should be easier; and fall into place.

Looking at all the possibilities with regards to 'why', nothing really adds up completely. For certain possibilities some things fit; but for others other bits fit. It seems nothing really fits one particular possibility.

The Greatest Show On Earth - Are we really meant to believe that Michael Jackson, as a performer, was reduced to faking his death to create the greatest show on Earth? The guy created Thriller in 1983, and classed as the most influential music video of all-time, and nobody thought that video could be equaled. But in 1991 he gave the world the Black Or White video and then in 1995 he gave the world the Earth Song video. So to suggest that Michael Jackson faked his death for the greatest show on Earth; as a comeback does not make sense when he had made phenomenal comebacks without having to fake his death.

Michael's Millions - Michael Jackson faked his death because someone, unknown, was after his money. If we were talking billions, or even trillions, then the possibility is a maybe. But we are talking millions. So the evil corporation that is Sony wanted Michael Jackson dead for a few million dollars? Why? Sony make billions each and every year (in 2008, the year before, Sony made $89,601,000,000 give or take a few million); from record publishing, sales, electronics, game consoles and software, and various financial investments. In all honesty Michael Jackson would be worth more to Sony alive rather than dead. With over 100 unreleased tracks lying around and a worldwide fan base; they could of had hit CD after hit CD pumped out to make billions through the Sony/ATV partnership. And that doesn't even include merchandising, concerts, DVDs, and other deals that could be had.

Please, discard the Illuminati. Allegedly these elite people are controlling world governments. Why would they want Michael Jackson dead? And, in theory, if they are as powerful as they are made out to be then Michael Jackson faking his death wouldn't save him. They would get to him. And if this Illuminati is made up of the elite surely Sony must have someone with some illuminated contact which means the Illuminati would be cutting off their nose to spite their face. So, I just don't feel it fits. Why control the world, and all the governments, and then go after one pop star; no matter how famous he is?

Death Threats - It has been suggested there existed the possibility of death threats against Michael Jackson; or his kids. Michael Jackson had death threats before, back in 1992, against himself and his sister Janet. He didn't feel the need to fake his death then. And if some psychotic person is threatening to kill his kids, faking his death doesn't guarantee they will be safe. And seriously what father goes into hiding while his children are being threatened? I just don't buy the death threat theory simply because it is no guarantee. If the threats were against Michael Jackson he can never come out of hiding because the risk could still remain. And if the threats were against his kids as a father he would stay, stand, and fight for his kids like any father would.

Witness Protection - Michael Jackson had help from government agencies to fake his death; and was put in to Federal witness protection. This theory has some merit; because for Michael Jackson to fake his death he may need some assistance from government agencies such as the FBI, CIA, or at the very least State police. But if it is witness protection; what will Michael Jackson be a witness to? Hollywood corruption? It was happening before he was born so why now do they need him as a witness? Medical corruption? Once again it was happening before he was even born; and there are people better qualified than Michael Jackson to be witnesses. Witness protection fits in some ways but it leaves the unanswered question of what he is a witness to that only he can be a witness to; and is large enough for him to fake his death.

That is why I feel that to answer all the questions that remain, without any doubt, the 'why' needs to be known. And for all I know the 'why' may be before June 25, 2009 by year; not just months or weeks.

Alive, or dead, some questions remain without answers. And these, as far as I see it, are important questions; but not as important as the whole 'why' question itself.

I split these questions, in my head, in to two categories - "If he is alive" and "If he is dead". Not that they really need to be categorized as such; it is just my personal way of ordering them in some sort of order from all the chaos.

If He Is Alive

• What is Murray's role in all of it?
• What do the Jackson family really know?
• Who, if anyone, outside the family really knows?
• Why such an extravagant faked death?
• When did the planning really start?
• Is it legally possible without government help?
• Why the whole involuntary manslaughter trial?
• Do his kids know?
• Will there ever be a comeback?

If He Is Dead

• Is the justice system so inept that it takes 2 years to get his killer to trial?
• Is the justice system so useless that they can infer homicide but only try Murray on involuntary manslaughter?
• Why the lies in various testimonies in court?
• Is it right that certain members of his family, who he had no real contact with, are making money from his name?
• Why haven't the family said much, and expanded, about the people behind the death if Murray was supposedly just the fall guy?
• Why is the autopsy report so botched if they did an actual autopsy?

This post does not really try to answer anything. After reading it back, for me, it leaves more questions than when I started it. But if people, who believe Michael Jackson faked his death and is alive, think there is nothing to investigate - until every question has an irrefutable answer and the 'why' fits 100% there is always something to investigate to get to the truth of the matter.

How Many Fakes Does It Take?

Don't worry it is not the start of a math question.

Another week and another fake Michael Jackson rolls on to the scene; wanting their 15 minutes of basement fame. Scary bit is they will most likely end up with it.

I just don't get it. People that have shown themselves to be quite intelligent and make rational choices and decisions jump on these fakes like flies on cow shit.

And thanks to the fakes, and the people that follow them and hang on their every bullshit lie, all the other believers and hoaxers look like a bunch of mentally retarded monkeys waiting to be fucked over.

It may seem harmless to follow these basement dwellers wanting to be Michael Jackson or someone who is in the know - but seriously you make yourself look like a fucking mental patient jonesing for medication; and unfortunately for the people not believing in the bullshit you drag us down with you.

But while you are dragging the hoax into the realms of inbred stupidity try and remember why you believe.

If you think Michael Jackson is going to fake his death just for some cum stain to announce his return on Twitter you need help. Seriously, turn off your computer, get out and see the sun. Fuck it - see a doctor.

Let us look at some facts. Now these are proven facts which don't rely on any mathematical equation, they don't rely on some ever-changing date, they are just facts:

• The album "Thriller" has sold more than 110 million copies; more than twice as many as the next best selling album.
• Won 13 awards at the 1983 Billboard Awards; which has never been accomplished by anyone else.
• Won 11 awards at the 1984 American Music Awards; a feat unmatched.
• Won 7 Grammy Awards in 1984.

Along with tons of other awards. And let us not forget that Michael Jackson has been award "Humanitarian Of The Year" on countless occasions. And while we are at it - it might be worth mentioning that the music industry consider him a legend, a pioneer, and a one of a kind. Oh and while we are on facts. Let us not forget that This Is It sold out at world-record speed.

With them kind of facts in mind do you really think that Michael Jackson, if he is ever going to come back, is going to announce a return on Twitter? Do you think a man that wowed millions, if not billions, with his music is going to let a purple egg talk for him? Do you think that the man who undoubtedly did more for the music industry than anyone else ever is going to make you work out a math equation that would of got Einstein scratching his head?

Come on, wake up, smell the fucking coffee. Michael has always had people wanting to make their name from his. Think it is any different now? Think these basement dwellers aren't working on the fact that some Michael Jackson fans need answers? Actually just think.

Welcoming Sheila To The Team

The newest member of the MJHDC team is now on Twitter (@OutsideSheila). Before she went too mainstream; I sat with her and asked the questions that will most likely be asked.

MJHDC: Another homeless person. Some may compare you to Homeless Dave and Starving Marvin. How do you feel about that?
Sheila: One big difference; they were both male. I'm not. And I have no connection with either of them.
MJHDC: So as a member of the MJHDC team I presume that you believe Michael Jackson may have faked his death?
Sheila: I believe it is possible but I don't follow every little clue. If Jermaine Jackson uses 7 squares of toilet paper when he wipes his ass in the morning I'm not going to be tweeting it is a sign. We are talking a guy being away from his family and children; not some sideshow for the fans.
MJHDC: So, do you believe?
Sheila: It is possible.
MJHDC: Did the Conrad Murray verdict sway you at all?
Sheila: No. As far as I see it. If you believe then the whole Murray in jail has to tie in some how. I'm not saying it does for sure but I'm saying you can't believe and think Murray killed Michael Jackson.
MJHDC: So how long have you felt it may be a hoax?
Sheila: Actually ever since you started on the Nazis. Someone pointed it out and although I thought your style was crude and vulgar you made some good points.
MJHDC: Well, thanks.
Sheila: But you hid all the good points behind stupid jokes and stupid pictures. So nobody knew if the good points were good points or just another joke.
MJHDC: One mans garbage is another mans treasure and all that.
Sheila: Just saying I would of done it different. If you wanted to call these fakes, wannabes, and assholes out just do it. No need to make a joke of it. I mean I read your tweets from Saturday morning and you insinuate that one of the moderators on the MJDHI forum is also an informer. If that is what you are saying just name names and get it over with.
MJHDC: It is a tad more difficult than that. You name names and for some reason it turns into your fault for pointing out what someone else was doing. So I thought it'd be wiser to point them in the general direction.
Sheila: But you know who it is?
MJHDC: Well yeah.
Sheila: And you mentioned matching IP addresses?
MJHDC: Am I supposed to be asking questions and not answering them?
Sheila: You did mention matching IP addresses though right?
MJHDC: Yeah. Someone mentioned something so I went and checked it out. The MJDHI forum is a SMF forum, which is essentially PHP and MySQL, but as it has customizable reports created using SQL queries as Admin you can easily check for things. Let us say, hypothetically, that you had a MySQL database which had your users in; and the table was called "smf_users". And in that table you had the IP address field "smf_login_ip" it is just checking the field for a count greater than 1. Any forum Admin should be able to check that.
Sheila: I see. So why not just say that?
MJHDC: Because not everyone in the hoax is going to understand if I start typing SQL queries; and to be honest spoon feeding answers doesn't help either. Everyone, myself included, needs to always check things for themselves not just go on what someone else says.
Sheila: Well thanks for letting me join the MJHDC team; and it has been good to dig into your weird, twisted, mind.
MJHDC: You are welcome - although somehow I thought I was meant to be digging into your mind.
Sheila: Just shows how bad you are at interviewing.
MJHDC: Thanks.
Sheila: I'm joking.

So Sheila has joined the MJHDC team. Will she last longer than Starving Marvin? Who knows.

Who Did Murray Kill?

On November 7, 2011 Dr. Conrad Murray was found guilty of involuntary manslaughter. Judge Pastor also remanded Murray in jail until sentencing on November 29, 2011. Does that mean the Michael Jackson death hoax is over?

Not necessarily. Certain things happened as Conrad Murray was found guilty that just didn't make sense.

Judge Pastor passes the verdict to Mrs Sammi Benson who reads it out:

"Superior Court of California; Los Angeles County. The people of the State of California, plaintiff versus Conrad Robert Murray, defendant. Case number FA073164. Title of court and cause. We the jury in the above title and action find the defendant, Conrad Robert Murray, guilty of the crime of involuntary manslaughter in violation of penal code section 192 sub-section B. Alleged victim Michael Joseph Jackson. Alleged date of June 25th 2009. As charged in count one of the information; this seventh day of November 2011. Foreperson juror ID number 145; seat number 3. Is this your verdict; is this your individual and personal verdict so say you one so say you all?"





Hold on there Mrs Benson. You said he was guilty yet the victim and day remain alleged? How is it alleged if he has been found guilty?

The dictionary defines 'alleged' as: "Represented as existing or as being as described but not so proved; supposed."

So Conrad Murray is guilty of involuntary manslaughter yet the victim and date have not been proved? Does that even make sense? How can a person be found guilty without a victim, or a date, being proved? In theory; they can't.

Also the alleged victim was Michael Joseph Jackson; yet  his driving license which according to the L.A. Coroner's office was used for identification purposes states his name as Michael Joe Jackson.

And if you want to get really technical the court documents from the 2005 case against Michael Jackson, where he was acquitted of all charges, all used "The People of the State of California v. Michael Joe Jackson" (Case 1133603 if you want to check).

So who the hell died? Because legally Michael Joseph Jackson is not Michael Joe Jackson; as any aliases used in court specifically have to be defined as such. So Mrs Benson would of had to say "Michael Joseph Jackson also known as Michael Joe Jackson."

And I know some are going to be saying: "Well let's not get picky here Joseph or Joe it is all the same." But in a court of law it is not the same; it is not even close. In a court of law one is a legal name and one is an undefined alias; and as an undefined alias is worthless.

So Murray may have been found guilty of involuntary manslaughter - but by legal definition it was not of Michael Joe Jackson.

Cigarette Warnings

Today A federal judge blocked a U.S. rule requiring tobacco companies to display graphic images on cigarette packs, such as a man exhaling cigarette smoke through a hole in his throat.

U.S. District Judge Richard Leon sided with tobacco companies and granted a temporary injunction, saying they would likely prevail in their lawsuit challenging U.S. health regulators' rule as unconstitutional because it compels speech in violation of the First Amendment.

But what if the warnings were not so graphic; but still had an impact?

"I SMOKE THESE"

Maybe a picture of the celebrity skank known as Lindsay Lohan saying she smokes them would deter potential smokers?

"EVERY SMOKE MAKES ME MORE FAMOUS"

Or Justin Bieber's fame rising because you smoke a cigarette could deter millions of people from lighting up.

"SMOKE THEM I'M A DOCTOR"

How about the infamous Dr. Conrad Murray saying it is OK to smoke? Surely a recommendation from a doctor that famously screwed up basic CPR should be enough to get people to quit?

The warnings on cigarettes don't have to be graphic - they just have to have reverse endorsements.

The Jurors Speak

With the weekend being the only time that the jurors, in the Conrad Murray trial, can actually take a break in thinking about the trial; it seemed like a great time to get them all in one room. The alcohol started flowing; and the jurors opened up.

Legal Notice: Details may have been fabricated, omitted, or altered for legal purposes. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

MJHDC: So how is deliberations going?
Juror 1: Not good, it is taking forever. Juror 5 had diarrhea on Friday and we ended up taking more breaks than necessary ...
Juror 5: Hey, not my fault. I still say it was the chicken from the court cafeteria that caused it.
Juror 8: Well I had the chicken and it didn't effect me in any way.
Juror 5: Aren't you just special then.
Juror 4: I had a bit of an icky stomach and I had the chicken.
Juror 9: The beef was fine.
MJHDC: OK. Back to the trial. How has the medical evidence played a part in your deliberations?
Juror 7: It didn't. Not in mine any way. They totally lost me. I don't know if it was 25mg or the whole bottle.
Juror 11: Yeah. It was hard to keep up with all the experts.
Juror 10: It wasn't what they were saying it was just how they were saying it.
Juror 2: I'll agree with that. It was bad enough listening to Walgren and Chernoff. And then these so-called experts got on the stand. I was just about ready to blow my own brains out.
Juror 12: Some it did seem a bit in-depth. And how we are meant to understand it all is just crazy.
Juror 3: Its all a fucking hoax. You know that?
MJHDC: Well it is a possibility; that is for sure. So Juror 3 you believe?
Juror 3: Of course. I'm here for the free lunches and a bit of free time away from work and the family. I have 5 kids. Any break I can get I take.
Juror 5: Well if you don't think Michael Jackson is dead how do you intend to come to a verdict.
Juror 3: Not guilty. Dumbass. Its obvious if MJ is alive then Murray is innocent.
MJHDC: So are you allowed to discuss if you have taken any votes yet?
Juror 12: We took a vote as soon as we went in the room. It was 4 for guilty and 7 for not guilty ...
MJHDC: That is only 11.
Juror 12: Well Juror 5 was in the bathroom and wouldn't shout his answer through the door.
MJHDC: I see. Is it still that way now you have had a day of deliberations?
Juror 4: We don't know. We haven't had a vote since.
MJHDC: Well how about now, a quick show of hands? All those that think Conrad Murray is guilty raise your hand. OK that is 3 of you.
Juror 6: What we voting on?
MJHDC: Whether you think Murray is guilty at the present moment.
Juror 6: Oh sorry. I thought it was about who had the chicken still. I don't think Murray is guilty.
Juror 5: Nice going Janice.
Juror 6: Tom I didn't think we were allowed to mention names.
Juror 5: I'm sure he'll edit all that out at the end.
MJHDC: Yeah. Sure; if I remember.
Juror 5: See.
Juror 6: OK then. Well I really liked how Walgren composed himself in the closing argument. If I wasn't a married woman ...
Juror 4: Janice you are not married.
Juror 6: Yes I am. Just because we have never met doesn't mean we can't be married.
Juror 5: Oh for fucks sake. Crazy bitch is never getting married. Lets be honest about it. She spent 15 minutes at lunch yesterday lining her garden peas up on her plate.
Juror 6: Well they did look neater. You know I hate mess.
Juror 5: Yeah you are the only one who took notes in chronological order. Me I just winged it and hoped I could copy off someone at the end.
MJHDC: Sticking to the trial. A lot has been said about Propofol. Anyone ever had it before?
Juror 3: Me. Had it when I came back from the Gulf.
MJHDC: So you was in the Gulf war?
Juror 3: No way. It was a vacation before all this war stuff kicked off. Anyway I drunkenly fell off the balcony at the hotel. Broke my arm and cracked 2 ribs; and had a major gash on my head. They did some exploratory surgery and then it was when I had the Propofol. Well I think it was Propofol it is all a bit hazy.
MJHDC: This discussion isn't breaking Judge Pastor's guidance of not discussing the trial is it?
Juror 12: I don't think so. We only get paid Monday to Friday. So I think as along as it is the weekend we are alright to talk about it.
Juror 9: Do we get a lunch break?
MJHDC: You have been here for 20 minutes. So no.
Juror 9: What about a break?
Juror 1: That has what it has been like all the time. We just start talking and someone wants to do something.
Juror 4: We might head over to Carolwood Drive on Monday. I think as the jury we can ask for little trips to look at the scene.
MJHDC: Sort of. If it is relevant I think you can.
Juror 4: See I told you we could.
MJHDC: I wouldn't take my answer as the final answer.
Juror 3: I'm taking a camera. The only believer on the jury. Be a feather in my cap so to speak.
Juror 6: You don't wear a cap.
Juror 3: It is a figure of speech.
Juror 7: What will we learn from seeing Michael Jackson's bedroom?
Juror 3: Who gives a shit. At least we will be there. I'm wearing my fedora on Monday just in case.
MJHDC: Finally, before I wrap this up, I'd like to ask each of you for your opinion on how the trial went.
Juror 1: I was bored through most of it. Most of my notes are covered in little doodles.
Juror 2: I'd rather not say.
Juror 3: Boring. Boring. And even more boredom. I know MJ is alive so why go through this show?
Juror 4: Its been pretty exciting compared to my normal work. I have 17 cats you know.
MJHDC: I'm sure you do.
Juror 5: At least I'm getting paid for sleeping. And I did get the phone number of Ms Brazil. Result.
Juror 6: I think it has been very enlightening and we are going to be diligent in our deliberations.
Juror 5: Sure we are. Heads he is guilty. Tails he is innocent.
Juror 7: I don't know right now what is going on. Someone shouted 'murderer' at me last night. I got scared.
MJHDC: So, people know who you all are then?
Juror 7: It is a bit obvious. We all leave court wearing our 'juror number badge' so it didn't take them too long to work it out.
Juror 8: He's guilty and I'm going to recommend lethal injection.
MJHDC: Thats not possible. He'll do a maximum of 4 years by California sentencing guidelines.
Juror 8: Well we might as well let him go with the other 30,000 criminals they are releasing then.
Juror 9: Is Lindsay Lohan going to jail? I'm not allowed to watch the news.
MJHDC: Maybe. After she has posed for Playboy. She'll be in overnight and out the next morning.
Juror 10: She's nothing but a skank ho. I'd rather see Betty Ford naked.
MJHDC: Betty Ford is dead.
Juror 10: You got a problem with that?
Juror 11: I'm hoping it all ends soon. I think I am getting sores on my butt from sitting so much. I don't know how the judge does it all the time.
Juror 12: I say we go back Monday and just say "Not guilty" and get it all over with. Aint nobody going to have him as a doctor now anyway.
MJHDC: True that.
Juror 5: Its a fucking hoax. I tried explaining the ambulance picture to you; and the whole Robert Earl Carter connection.
Juror 7: Not that again.
MJHDC: Well you obviously have more to talk about. So good luck on Monday. And about 3.30PM if you could make your announcement I have a little bet going. Thanks.

After this discussion had taken place the jurors all left for their own lives. For legal reasons Janice's real name of Susan, and Tom's real name of Jason, were never mentioned.

Two-Faced Justice

Yesterday as Conrad Murray left the court some of the 'Justice4MJ' people were heard shouting "Murray is a murderer". Well, actually they were chanting it as he left.

So what the hell are they going to do if the guy is found innocent by 12 jurors?

They going to say that the decision is wrong? They going to complain there is no justice in the justice system? Or are they actually going to think before they start chanting their judgemental bullshit outside the court?

Let us take a little trip down memory lane, back to 2005, when Michael Jackson was acquitted of all charges.

Michael Jackson was indicted for four counts of molesting a minor, four counts of intoxicating a minor in order to molest him, one count of attempted child molestation, and one count of conspiring to hold the boy and his family captive at his 2,700-acre Neverland Ranch, as well as conspiring to commit extortion and child abduction. On June 13, 2005, the jury found Michael Jackson not guilty on all fourteen charges, which included all of the above plus four lesser-included misdemeanor counts.

So the question remains: Are these people that have promoted themselves to Judge, Jury, and executioner for Conrad Murray really going to say that there was a miscarriage of justice? Because the way I see it - If it is good enough justice to prove Michael Jackson innocent; no matter what the outcome it must also be good enough for Conrad Murray.

The 12 jurors are just ordinary people, like you and me, that have no specific medical training in the 'Propofol' area; and are working with the evidence and facts that were presented in the court room. As Judge Pastor said yesterday; this is the only evidence and facts they may use in reaching their decision. And to be honest, the whole 'medical expert' testimonies confused the hell out of me; but I see it from both sides.

Yes Murray was employed, although he never got paid, to care for Michael Jackson. But if the whole theory for the prosecution is that Murray set up a Propofol drip; and there is no tube for that then a question remains: Why did Murray leave everything else and just take one tube.

And that is going to be one of the many questions that the jury will be discussing I'm sure. And if they can't find a reason for Murray to take one item and leave everything else connected with the alleged Propofol IV drip it leaves reasonable doubt. And as such they cannot find him guilty of the charge of involuntary manslaughter without a shadow of a doubt.

So will the 'Justice4MJ' people forget that 12 jurors gave Michael Jackson an innocent verdict and they agreed with that just because the justice system may do the same to Conrad Murray?

I'm not advocating the justice system is perfect. Far from it. But at the same time it has to be said if it is good enough for one it is good enough for another. Yes mistakes are are made but at the same time it is not a time to become two-faced and say it is good enough for one and not the other.

It reminds me of the old saying "What is good for the goose is good for the gander."

The Hoaxer's Halloween

The following story is fictional. All people, places, and situations bearing any resemblance to real life, persons living or dead, is purely coincidental.

It was the night before Halloween, Devil's Night to some, but to the various hoaxers, and believers, around the world it was the third night in which believers were being killed off.

Two days ago, in California, a prolific believer had been killed. Local police had chalked the murder up to just another senseless killing; but any believer who saw the crime scene knew something more had taken place.

When Twiggy was discovered. She was tied to her bed; her naked body seemingly punctured over and over again by a knife. Blood soaked the sheets. If that was all the details believers might also feel it was just another senseless murder. But there was clues that police had overlooked - because to them the clues meant nothing. All over the wall, written in blood, was the phrase "7x7x7". There was a single white glove found on the floor. The police did a complete sweep of the room - no fingerprints, no DNA, no nothing as evidence.

The local police, in California, said it was a killing, that although strange, appeared to be random and would unlikely be repeated. As far as they were concerned it was another murder that would go unsolved.

Yesterday in Newcastle, England, another believer was killed. The body of Henda had been found hanging in an abandoned warehouse. Hanging from the beam was Henda. His body had slowly dripped every fluid ounce of blood to the floor below. Yet again another killing. Local media said that the police were confused by the scene but were unlikely to solve this murder.

The scene was later described by the local news. Henda had been hanging, his blood slowly leaving his body as he died a slow, painful, death. Police found a single white glove; although there was no message this time. No message until the blood was cleaned up that is. As the blood was washed from the floor, below Henda was a circular message - a calling card. It read "7x7x7x7x7x7x". Once again there was no evidence. No fingerprints. Nothing.

The rumors were already starting on Twitter. Someone was going around the world killing believers. But who could be doing such a thing. Who could be creating these horrible murder scenes without leaving the police so much as a single strand of evidence to work with?

Then it happened. As soon as the news broke it was all over Twitter. Souza, the administrator of a hoax forum, had been killed. Details were sketchy to say the least. All that was known is that Souza had been murdered. Yet another believer killed. The scene was later described: Souza had been in the kitchen. Someone took a knife and cut her throat. Then they cut off her arms; then her legs. She had died screaming in pain. Once again there was a single white glove. There was also the message of "7x7x7" carved into her torso. No evidence was found.

It was the next day, Halloween, believers worldwide were worried that one of them was going to be next. Three people had died and it would most likely happen again tonight. But who was it to be? Butterflies400 checked her direct messages on Twitter - one stood out:

Happy Halloween Hoaxers!

Wake Up The Trial Is Almost Over

The Conrad Murray trial is all but over. And what have we learned from it all? Medical experts chosen as witnesses seem to be one step away from comatose. They are possibly the most boring people in the entire world.

Michael Jackson didn't need Propofol - he should of just paid these people to sit in his room and start them talking. He'd of been asleep in seconds and would have stayed asleep for hours while these boring bastards discussed the various details of IV bags, Propofol, and other things.

This is possibly the trial of the decade. The current generations OJ Simpson trial and it is full of boring people with about as much personality as roadkill.

Judge Michael Pastor has tried to inject a little bit of life with the occasional joke or smart remark. But that has not been enough to counter the likes of Flanagan, Chernoff, White, and Shafer who have made it a personal mission to send the jurors to sleep.

Why couldn't Jim Carrey be a Propofol expert? Anybody but the boring people they paraded in court. It could have all been so different:

Chernoff: And your name for the record is?
Witness: Dr Who.
Chernoff: Who?
Witness: No, not really, it is Dr James Steele, I just always wanted to use the Dr Who line.
Chernoff: Umm OK. And you are an expert in Propofol?
Wtiness: Yes I am. I can get you some seems your boy there can't order it anymore.
Chernoff: No, that is not what I meant.
Witness: Well you need to be clearer then.
Chernoff: So can you describe ...
Witness: Wait. I got one for you. Two nuns walk into a bar and order Propofol ...
Judge: Whoa there. Now is not the time.
Witness: Just trying to lighten the mood.
Judge: Its a very serious matter.
Witness: That is what the bartender said to the nuns.
Chernoff: Objection.
Judge: Overruled I've heard that one before it is what the bartender says.

Nobody cares how many milligrams of Propofol it takes to put a piglet butt to sleep. Nobody cares what Dr White had to say. The trial has been a let down. So no matter what the outcome of the trial it may go down in history as one of the most boring 'celebrity' trials ever.

You know it is a boring trial when the highlight has been a pumpkin, an elephant, and Murray's hooker girlfriend showing up with her dollar store weave looking like she just finished a shift at 'Jiggles' strip club.

Getting What You Get

McDonald's estimate that they sell 550 million Big Macs in the United States alone. That is 17 Big Macs sold every second. There are at present 307,006,550 people in the United States - so that is almost 2 Big Macs per every person in the United States.

But why the fuck are they so popular? As burgers go they are definitely not the tastiest burger.

As price goes they are also not the cheapest - the average price in the United States for a Big Mac is $3.90 (just for the Big Mac sandwich). It is estimated because of buying power and other factors it costs just 70 cents to make each Big Mac.  That is a whopping $3.20 gross profit per each Big Mac sandwich; or a yearly gross profit of $1,760,000,000. Over 1.75 BILLION dollars each year just on the Big Mac sandwich.

Big Mac Promotional Picture

This is the picture you see when you order your Big Mac sandwich. Notice the succulent burger patties. Notice the crisp green lettuce. Notice the soft bun. Everything placed together with love, care, and attention. It is the picture of health as far as burger sandwiches go.

But it is also a complete fucking lie.

Actual Big Mac

This is a picture of an actual Bic Mac sandwich. You will notice the burger overall looks a whole lot smaller than the 'advertising' picture that McDonald's use. Look at those burger patties - not only are they anorexic in comparison but they look drier than the Sahara Desert. The lettuce is looking a little limp; and the bun is looking like it has seen better days. And what happened to the love, care, and attention putting it together?

How many people hand it back and say "What the fuck is this shit? I didn't order this fucking abortion. You see that burger with the number 1 next to it that is what I fucking ordered. I wouldn't give this shit you just sold me to my neighbor's dog. And by the way I don't like my neighbor's dog!"

Globally, and not just at McDonald's, people have become more apathetic. We'll accept pretty much anything without complaining. And big corporations and governments have noticed that on the whole the general public will bend over and take it up the ass; and say "thank you" afterwards.

It is like walking in to a car dealership and ordering one of these:

Ferrari F-430 Spider

And getting one of these for your $100,000:

Reliant Robin

Saying thanks to the dealer as you drive off at 0 to 60 in about 2 minutes - and a fucking wheel short.

But corporations and governments will only keep shafting the public as long as they can get away with it. If the majority say nothing they'll keep pushing out the same shit at higher and higher prices without giving a flying fuck about the person they are selling it to.

Legal Notice: All copyrighted products, trademarks, and the like are used only for descriptive purposes and in stating an opinion about said products.

Senior Drug Dealers

Ever wonder why the elderly go to bed so early; and then get up the following morning before anyone else? Me too. So I thought about it for about 5 seconds before I decided to write this post.

There is a ton of scientific evidence to prove that as people get older they need less sleep; and this is why old people go to bed early and get up early too. Bollocks; it is nothing more than a cover story - an alibi from a shady character merely put out there to fool the masses in to believing that old people are all nice and sweet.

After 5 seconds of thought I worked out what was being covered up. Our senior citizens are nothing but low-life drug peddlers.

Don't start writing that Grandpa and Grandma wouldn't even think of doing such a thing. Just because Grandma knits the occasional seasonal cardigan; and Grandpa is usually asleep right after dinner means nothing. It is just part of the conspiracy cover-up that has been force fed to generation after generation to keep their secret lives secret.

Ask any member of the police force and you'll find that most 'dawn raids' happen between 6:00AM and 7:00AM. That is why Grandma and Grandpa are up at 5:30AM. The early bird catches the worm but the earlier old people beat the police. But why are the elderly so intent on beating the police? Because they are all growing, making, and selling drugs.

They have worked all their lives putting a little away for their retirement. Then when they retire they realize that retirement will not support Grandma's bingo habit; or Grandpa's pipe tobacco. So they need to supplement their income and they enter the underworld of drug dealing.

Grandpa has spent his life learning from his father and Grandfather learning to grow successful crops each year - no matter what the weather may bring. Come retirement he is going to put all that horticultural knowledge to good use and grow his own medicinal marijuana for himself and his friends down the Legion. Slowly the word spreads and before you know it Grandpa has taken over the Legion and got a couple of ex-army friends as bouncers on the door.

And don't think that while Grandpa is out there selling his 'medicine' to various people Grandma is at home enjoying a cup of coffee and watching Oprah. Hell no, she is out there catching up with the gossip. She knows more about the entire neighborhood - it would take 50 FBI agents a lifetime to learn what she knows about every single person within 5 miles of her home.  Grandma is the 'intel' she keeps her ear to the ground to see who knows what. You think it is merely a coincidence that she speaks to Joyce the mother of the local Sheriff. Think again.

Grandma: Hello Joyce.
Joyce: Hello Geraldine.
Grandma: Nice weather we are having.
Joyce: That it is especially for this time of year.
Grandma: How is your George?
Joyce: Not too well. Having a hip replacement next week.
Grandma: Oh I am sorry to hear that.
Joyce: It'll do him good.
Grandma: And your Jacob; how is he doing?
Joyce: Busy at work. Got the state police coming in tomorrow for a drug bust in the area. He hates them dawn raids.
Grandma: Ah I see. Local people?
Joyce: Them young lads living in that trailer.
Grandma: Never did like them.

A seemingly innocent conversation. But Grandma now knows where the police will be at 6:00AM tomorrow; and that there will be new customers if she plays her cards right.

So Grandma and Grandpa may look like the sweetest old couple you know. But in reality they are supplementing their income by selling drugs. How do you think they afforded the new car and the cruise last year?

Where Is Arnie?

Like some fucking psychedelic Wheres Waldo picture. The courtroom today, including the jury, has to be wondering "Where is Arnie Klein?"

While the so-called sleep medicine expert, Dr Nader Kamangar, said his review of Jackson's records showed the singer received Demerol from Beverly Hills dermatologist Dr. Arnold Klein.

Now cast your mind back three weeks ago: Ed Chernoff told jurors that in the months before his death, Jackson visited Klein's office as many as two to three times a week. "Dr Arnold Klein addicted Michael Jackson to Demerol."

The defense team, for Dr Conrad Murray is going to try and prove that due to a Demerol addiction Michael Jackson suffered from insomnia which Murray was trying to treat.

So, his name is being thrown around the courtroom like Murray throws one-dollar bills around a strip club and yet Arnie Klein is not going to be called. Odd? No, more like completely fucking weird. Arnie Klein is not even on the possible witness list; and in one of the pre-trial hearings the judge, Michael Pastor, ensured that Arnie Klein would not testify by limiting evidence to 72 hours before the death of Michael Jackson - and only that which is relevant to the care Dr Conrad Murray provided to Michael Jackson.

Although Arnie may have played the biggest part leading up to all this he will never have to testify in court about anything. Which means we will never know - not that we would anyway because Arnie Klein is known to tell the odd lie or two or thousand.

Some have suggested that the prosecution were instrumental in keeping Arnie Klein out of the courtroom because of concerns from the Michael Jackson estate. Now, the only thing I could find is that back in 2004, Howard Weitzman, who now represents the Michael Jackson estate and executors in all litigation matters represented Arnie Klein in a lawsuit where Klein was unsuccessfully sued for botox misuse on a patient. Allegedly, since then Howard Weitzman hasn't spoken to Klein.

Lets Call A Spade A Spade

Before anyone starts complaining that to use the term 'spade' is racist; according to Wikipedia it simply means: "To be outspoken, blunt, even to the point of rudeness; to call things by their proper names without any 'beating about the bush'."

Right with that little bit out the way on to the post; which is all about some fake ass wannabe Michael Jackson on Twitter. That person is @mjviva.

I went over to their account to check their tweets to see if there had just been a misunderstanding of some sort and read the last 7 days. No misunderstanding - the person is definitely a basement dweller that thinks they are Michael Jackson; well they think they are but then in other tweets they think they are not and are just involved somehow.

Before looking at the tweets lets get one thing out of the way. If Michael Jackson faked his death on June 25, 2009 in front of the whole world he is not going to make some announcement about his well-being, location, or life with a Twitter account that is just a fucking egg. Seriously, if you think that I am sure there are a million telemarketers that would love to call you right now and sell you something you don't need.

Anyway, on with the tweets:

(October 7, 2011)

"SEE YOU SOON. MICHAEL" You'll notice the period between "soon" and "Michael". So it is is Michael? Of course it is. No really that is all the proof you need. No it is not JokeCalmsChina, PeterPanPYT, or InMySmallCell (or whatever). Michael Jackson has tweeted to the entire world. Of course he didn't - because a purple egg told you this you are going to believe it? Take drugs in your strange world?

(Both October 7, 2011)

"The return timing is 2011." "Expect something good in November." The classic lines from bullshit basement dwellers. Anticipation. So November 2011? I doubt it. It just gives mjviva a whole extra month before they are outed to even the blind as a fake.

You all know how to look at a Twitter profile. I don't need to be pasting every little tweet for you to read.  But just remember that the tweets are signed as "MJ aka mjviva" and "MICHAEL". If you think it is Michael all well and good I'm sure you'll lead a very fruitful life and eventually working up to manager at the local McDonalds.

But seriously, if you want to believe that this purple egg has any connection to the hoax go ahead. No really. Makes no difference to me. I just know that come the end of November 2011 a bunch of people will all come to the realization this mjviva is another person that has a sad life and instead of being themselves they have to pretend to be Michael Jackson on Twitter.

Don't take my word for it. Look at what they have tweeted. Read the Twitlonger posts they posted and decide for yourself. But while you are deciding remember that this purple egg Michael Jackson is meant to be the same Michael Jackson that sold millions of albums; and wowed millions with his concerts?

From Three To One

Starving Marvin is dead. A short and fruitless life really so no great loss. Hoax News Network has moved on to pastures new; and as all will undoubtedly remember Homeless Dave was fired for accepting a 'bribe' from Propofol as a sponsor.

So where does that leave everything? Exactly where it was before - MJHDC. All the others were merely puppets created by a strange and weird mind that just decided to cut their strings.

As can be seen by the 'new' blog header it is just one crazy ass dog again.

Let the fun begin.

Welcome Starving Marvin

With the departure of the Homeless wonder known as Dave it was necessary to keep the Unholy Trinity in balance; and recruit a third person. That person is Marvin 'Starving' Jackson a homeless person from Detroit. The reason another homeless person was chosen was to maintain a 'charitable' tax-exempt status.

Marvin is not a volunteer and will receive a weekly salary of $2. He originally wanted $5 a week but negotiations reached the figure mentioned.

Marvin can be found on Twitter as @MarvinStarving.

I took some time to talk to Marvin as the newest member of The Unholy Trinity.

MJHDC: So Marvin what do you want to say to introduce yourself?
Marvin: Holla nigga. I am officially up in this shit. That $2 is cash right?
MJHDC: Yeah.
Marvin: What about health benefits?
MJHDC: None.
Marvin: No worries I just get myself down the VA hospital. About the only thing a nigga gets for fighting on behalf of his country. Man, I saw shit that would make your eyes fall out and your ass explode with fear.
MJHDC: Which war was you in?
Marvin: I was in 'Nam. I'm still there some days. Never forget some of that shit. I saw bodies piled 5 high being used as sand bags. You don't forget that shit. And we got home all the people fucking looking at us like we were shit because the hippies said there should be no war. I fucking fought for my country. Here count my fingers.
MJHDC: 9.
Marvin: Left the other one in 'Nam. Fucking Viet Cong took it trying to get information. I didn't say shit. Then my unit stormed that place. Dead Charlies everywhere.
MJHDC: Have you been following the Conrad Murray trial at all?
Marvin: Hell no, media going to try to hang a nigga whether they got shit on him or not. If Conrad Murray was white he'd of got a pat on the back and a fucking medal from that turncoat president. Vote for me I am black when I get in the Whitehouse I'll turn my back. Fucker hasn't done shit for the hood. Steps in the hood and no matter how many guards he has he'll be another statistic.
MJHDC: But Conrad is accused of killing Michael Jackson.
Marvin: Hell that was one fucked up dude. I didn't get why he wanted to be white.
MJHDC: That was a disease. Vitiligo.
Marvin: I'd rather have a few white patches than be all white. No offense it isn't your fault. You was born that way.
MJHDC: Umm. Moving on. Have you seen any of the trial?
Marvin: I caught that Ed Chernoff guy talking. If he was my attorney I'd be putting 9mm of cold steel in my mouth and saying goodbye to the world. He was all stammering and shit. I would bet my food stamps that he only got to be an attorney by sucking a real attorney off. I've heard better sentences coming from the Special Needs spelling bee competition. Now that white haired guy looks like a smart cookie. If you got to choose one of them to stand up for you I would of picked that fucker. You know him and the judge play golf together at their exclusive 'white people' only country club. Conrad has got to man up and tell that Chernoff to sit the fuck down.
MJHDC: So you haven't really kept up with the trial?
Marvin: They are going to do the same to Conrad as they did to OJ. And if Arnie Klein isn't found guilty it will be the LA riots all over again.
MJHDC: What exactly are you bringing to the Unholy Trinity?
Marvin: Experience. And you and Hoax News will be able to walk in the ghetto with getting your lily white asses shot. I remember this line from Lench Mob: "White boys white boys love hip-hop. Come to the ghetto and they get shot." Trust me it is no different here in Detroit. You walk your white ass down the wrong street you going out in a body bag. Just the way it is man.
MJHDC: Thanks I think.
Marvin: And I am a personal friend of Joe Jackson.
MJHDC: You know Joe Jackson?
Marvin: That is what I said are you deaf? When I say friend what I mean is that I know this guy who owned a Buick. Well it turns out that at one point Joe Jackson thought about buying it. He didn't but he nearly did. Makes us family almost.
MJHDC: Well you are a Jackson.
Marvin: No relation whatsoever.
MJHDC: Well what would you like to say as way of an introduction?
Marvin: Bitches and pimps I'm all up in this shit. You don't like me fuck off. I sure as hell am not being paid to be nice to you fucking people.
MJHDC: (laughing) You should get paid per cuss word.
Marvin: Hell no. It is only when I'm drinking I cuss.
MJHDC: I see. Any parting words?
Marvin: See you fuckers on the flipside. Peace. I'm outtie.

Get A Federal Business Name

Federal Reserve

Back in 1913 the Federal Reserve System was introduced thanks to the Federal Reserve Act. Its duties today, according to official Federal Reserve documentation, are to conduct the nation's monetary policy, supervise and regulate banking institutions, maintain the stability of the financial system and provide financial services to depository institutions, the U.S. government, and foreign official institutions.

But the Federal Reserve is not part of the Government. The Federal Reserve System's structure is composed of the presidentially appointed Board of Governors (or Federal Reserve Board), the Federal Open Market Committee (FOMC), twelve regional Federal Reserve Banks located in major cities throughout the nation, numerous privately owned U.S. member banks and various advisory councils. The FOMC is the committee responsible for setting monetary policy and consists of all seven members of the Board of Governors and the twelve regional bank presidents, though only five bank presidents vote at any given time. The Federal Reserve System has both private and public components, and was designed to serve the interests of both the general public and private bankers.

Federal Express (FedEx)

Originally called FDX Corp., FedEx Corp. was formed in January 1998 with the acquisition of Caliber System Inc. Through this and future purchases, FedEx sought to build on the strength of its famous express delivery service and create a more diversified company that included a portfolio of different but related businesses. Caliber subsidiaries included RPS, a small-package ground service; Roberts Express, an expedited, exclusive-use shipping provider; Viking Freight, a regional, less-than-truckload (LTL) freight carrier serving the Western U.S.; Caribbean Transportation Services, a provider of airfreight forwarding between the U.S., Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic and the Caribbean Islands; and Caliber Logistics and Caliber Technology, providers of integrated logistics and technology solutions. These companies, along with worldwide express shipping provider Federal Express, composed the original FDX Corp. 

Over the next two years FDX Corp. oversaw the assimilation of these companies and introduced them to many trademark service and technology enhancements.

In January 2000, FedEx unleashed the power of its global brand. In a move to further integrate the company's portfolio of services, FDX Corp. was renamed FedEx Corporation. In addition, Federal Express became FedEx Express, RPS became FedEx Ground, Roberts Express became FedEx Custom Critical, and Caliber Logistics and Caliber Technology were combined to make up FedEx Global Logistics. To centralize the sales, marketing, customer service and information technology support for FedEx Express and FedEx Ground, a new subsidiary named FedEx Corporate Services (FedEx Services) was formed and began operations in June 2000.

Federal Express was so-named due to the patriotic meaning associated with the word "Federal," which suggested an interest in nationwide economic activity. At that time, Smith hoped to obtain a contract with the Federal Reserve Bank and, although the proposal was denied, he believed the name was a particularly good one for attracting public attention and maintaining name recognition.

Two companies using the moniker "Federal" yet not belonging to the U.S. government. So is the FBI (Federal Bureau of Investigations) a private company? Of course not.

FBI

The FBI originated from a force of special agents created in 1908 by Attorney General Charles Bonaparte during the presidency of Theodore Roosevelt. The two men first met when they both spoke at a meeting of the Baltimore Civil Service Reform Association. Roosevelt, then Civil Service commissioner, boasted of his reforms in federal law enforcement. It was 1892, a time when law enforcement was often political rather than professional. Roosevelt spoke with pride of his insistence that Border Patrol applicants pass marksmanship tests, with the most accurate getting the jobs. Following Roosevelt on the program, Bonaparte countered, tongue in cheek, that target shooting was not the way to get the best men. "Roosevelt should have had the men shoot at each other and given the jobs to the survivors."

So, how does the Federal Reserve and Federal Express get away with using a company name that obviously should be restricted to government usage only? Well, maybe it should be but it isn't.

A quick search of trademarks on the United States Patent & Trademark Office (USPTO) website reveals 2,214 records using the term "Federal". On the first page of results is Federal Coffee. Federal Coffee supposedly sell the nation's strongest coffee; and if you want to ask them you can find them on Twitter under the username @FederalCoffee surprisingly enough. Are they affiliated with the U.S. government in any way? No. The Federal Coffee trademark is owned by Federal Coffee Incorporated. There is also one called You Don't Know Me Federal Witness Program; which turns out to be owned by Cotton City Incorporated and is merely the design of a T-shirt which they trademarked. Incidentally Cotton City Inc. is owned by Ace Incorporated.

It would thus appear that anyone can use the word 'Federal' in their business name. But is it that easy? Yes and no.

The dictionary defines the word 'federal' as:

Adjective:

1. Of, relating to, or being a form of government in which a union of states recognizes the sovereignty of a central authority while retaining certain residual powers of government.

2. Of or constituting a form of government in which sovereign power is divided between a central authority and a number of constituent political units.

3. Of or relating to the central government of a federation as distinct from the governments of its member units.

4. Favorable to or advocating federation: The senator's federal leanings were well known.

5. Relating to or formed by a treaty or compact between constituent political units.

6. Federal

a. Of, relating to, or supporting Federalism or the Federalist Party.

b. Of, relating to, or loyal to the Union cause during the American Civil War.

7. often Federal Of, relating to, or being the central government of the United States.

8. Federal Relating to or characteristic of a style of architecture, furniture, and decoration produced in the United States especially in the late 18th and early 19th centuries and characterized by adaptations of classical forms combined with typically American motifs.

Noun:

1. Federal

a. A supporter of the Union during the American Civil War, especially a Union soldier.

b. A Federalist.

2. often Federal A federal agent or official.

But if you head down the page 'Federal' is also defined as: 

Adjective:

1. federal - national; especially in reference to the government of the United States as distinct from that of its member units; "the Federal Bureau of Investigation"; "federal courts"; "the federal highway program"; "federal property.

So in layman terms Federal = National. So any company in the U.S., that is a national company, could in theory use the term Federal. And it is being allowed by the U.S. Patent & Trademark office unless the government own Federal Coffee and just don't want to admit it. So as long as you are based in the U.S., and your product is national, you can use the term 'Federal' in your business name without worrying the FBI are going to come banging on your door and arrest you.

Maybe in a few years we will see other people take up the term 'Federal' in their business names. Who knows this time next month there may be a Federal Charles Manson Fan Club or a Federal Joke Shop doing business.

Note: This is in no way any form of legal advice. If you intend to attempt to use the term 'Federal' or 'Fed' in a business name it would be advisable to seek legal advice, and representation, before doing so. Also in no way is Federal Express, Federal Reserve, Federal Coffee related to each other in business; or any other way.

Mankind Versus Conrad Murray

The entire U.S. nation was united in outrage as the Supreme Court denied Troy Davis a stay of execution. As the decision was announced Twitter and Facebook went crazy with the same outrage.

I have taken no time to look in to the Troy Davis case and so will not comment on guilt, or lack of it, other than to say that if there is even the smallest of doubt then an execution should not take place. You just cannot reverse an execution if later evidence proves a persons innocence.

But it did get me thinking about the Michael Jackson fans (believers and non-believers) on Twitter who were rallying in support of Troy Davis. It wasn't a good feeling it was kind of a 'I want to reach through the screen and strangle you hypocritical fuckers' feeling.

Back in 2005 every Michael Jackson fan would practically kill anyone who even suggested that he was guilty of the charges he was acquitted of. But these same fans will stand up for Troy Davis because of what they have heard; yet they want to see Conrad Murray either rot in hell or prison.

Is it fair for the same fans that were shouting "Justice for Michael" in 2005 and are now shouting "Justice 4 MJ" to be ready to become judge, jury, and executioner for Conrad Murray?

I must have missed the police statement that went something like this:

Detective Donald Nutkins said outside 100 North Carolwood Drive this morning: "We have a pretty open and shut case. Luckily for the investigation team there was hundreds of Michael Jackson fans sitting around in the bedroom, and other rooms, that saw everything that went on. I'll be surprised if Conrad Murray is not doing life for this heinous crime."

Oh that is right. I didn't miss that statement because it never happened.

I'm not defending Conrad Murray in any way, shape, or form I just feel that he should be given his opportunity in a court of law. That is not to say the justice system is 100% correct, and yes it makes mistakes, but that is what we have to live with.

A lot of messed up shit happened in North Carolwood Drive. And from what has been reported only half of it may be true and the rest complete bullshit. I don't know because I was not there. Only two people know for sure what happened on the morning of June 25, 2009 at 100 North Carolwood Drive and neither one of them is saying much.

(Like an adventure book you get to choose your own path now. Read which section you feel fits you better.)

Believers read this bit: Conrad Murray is sticking with the story he is meant to stick to. He knows exactly what happened and although a million and one clues were left he has to play his part to the very end. Michael may very well clear Conrad's name in the near future.

Non-believers read this bit: Conrad Murray isn't saying what is going on because he is charged with the death of Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson isn't saying anything because in one way or another he unfortunately died.

(Everyone can read the last bit.)

We may never know the full facts of what happened at the home of Michael Jackson on the morning of June 25, 2009. But should we fall into the trap of judging a person because of what has been said in the media much like what was done to Michael Jackson back in 2005?

And while we are on the subject of hypocrisy now might be a good time to mention the religious people that have already condemned Conrad Murray. As one of the Unholy Trinity I don't actually believe this; but here is a couple of quotes from your Bible:

"So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her." (John 8:7 KJV)

"Judge not, that ye be not judged." (Matthew 7:1 KJV)

So all the religious people can get off their high horses if they have condemned Conrad Murray already. Unless they want to admit they only pick and choose the bits from the Bible that fit with their life choices.

Halloween Cosplay

According to Wikipedia Cosplay is defined as:

Cosplay, short for "costume play", is a type of performance art in which participants don costumes and accessories to represent a specific character or idea. Characters are often drawn from popular fiction in Japan, but recent trends have included American cartoons and Sci-Fi. Favourite sources include manga, anime, comic books, graphic novels, video games, hentai and fantasy movies. Any entity from the real or virtual world that lends itself to dramatic interpretation may be taken up as a subject. Inanimate objects are given anthropomorphic forms and it is not unusual to see genders switched, with women playing male roles and vice versa.

With Halloween fast approaching now is the time that adults attending parties start thinking about costumes to wear. So why go in one of the played out costumes that has been seen a million times before when you can wow family, friends, neighbors, and anyone else that sees you dressed in a somewhat more unique costume.

But where to start? According to Wikipedia you can use, amongst other things, comics and video games as inspiration.

Not feeling totally creative? Get creative with a few ideas from around the world wide web.

Eat magic mushrooms and pretend you are reliving the eighties. Go as Mario; from Super Mario Brothers:

Some overalls, a red shirt, white gloves, and a fake moustache and you too could be leaving the party with your own Princess Peach. Just be aware that should any plumbing problems occur you will be asked to just 'take a look'.

Get yourself down the barber and ask for one of those nice eighties flat-tops. You are now ready to to be Guile from Street Fighter:

As can be seen from the photo natural hair colored, and styled, correctly will beat a wig anytime. The costume is easy. Army green wife-beater, camouflage pants, black boots and a set of dog tags. Support the troops while enjoying Halloween. Having a friend dress as M. Bison, also from Street Fighter, is optional but you could do a few rounds of fighting if the party really sucks.

Not a Street Fighter fan? Always thought that Mortal Kombat kicked Street Fighter's ass? No worries:

Get over here and go as Scorpion from the superior Mortal Kombat game. Find a black ninja suit, add a motocross face mask, strap some shin pads to your arms (as seen in the photo), and a yellow tabbard and you can be the hellish belle of the ball. Once again having a friend dressed as Sub-Zero is optional. If getting to the party on public transport it may not be wise to carry Scorpion's signature short spear attached to rope.

Not in to video games? Well there is always comic books as inspiration. Spiderman Spiderman does whatever a spider can and this Halloween you can do whatever a spider does too.

Spiderman costumes are not just for little boys - big boys can wear them too. Get a costume from Walmart and you are set. Any Green Goblins at the party take them out with your new found web-slinging abilities. And if you want to make the costume look for a red/blue full-body spandex suit - available at all good sports shops. Using a permanent marker draw a big spider on the front (if you want to technical you could use one of those silver markers and do the webbing too). Buy a Spiderman mask and you are all set to wow Mary Jane (Please note I said "wow" Mary Jane not "smoke" Mary Jane).

Every man at Halloween wants to revert back to being a little boy; even if it is just for one night. So forget Spiderman, Superman, and the Incredible Hulk and go as Edward Elric; The Full Metal Alchemist:

The above photo does not do young Edward justice. No blond hair and I don't ever remember seeing the alchemist wearing glasses. But the over all effect is there. Black pants, black shirt, red long jacket, and a pair of white gloves. That is it - you are good to go. But before you head out to try and create a philosopher's stone you may want to put the Full Metal Alchemist logo on the back of the jacket. As another side note when looking for pictures of people wearing Edward Elric costumes the vast amount were actually female. A quick discussion at Cosplay says this is due to Edward Elric having a long ponytail. So if you are a woman and want to dress as a man Edward Elric is right up your street.

Ladies don't be thinking you cannot join in on the Halloween cosplay fun because you are well catered for in the cartoon/comic book cosplay world:

Lara Croft - now you can attend Halloween party looking exactly like Angelina Jolie. Possibly one of the easiest costumes going. A light blue tank top, some brown shorts, a pair of boots, and a couple of handguns. That s it - you are good to go. Plastic toy handguns can be used; but the real deal will come in handy when your ass gets that unwanted pinch. As an added bonus the 'Lara Croft' covers all 3 genres - Comic, Video Game, and Movie.

Back to Mortal Kombat; and more importantly Kitana:

Another easy costume. matching light blue bodice, undies, loin cloth, and leggings. A couple of fans with tin foil blades and a pair of boots and you are ready to kick Halloween in to the Netherealm. And for next year die it all pink and be the 'classic' Mileena from Mortal Kombat.

OK Guys if you really want to be Kitana it would appear you can be:

Not that I'm recommending it in any way but it is an option.

But let us not forget that sometimes the retro look is just what you want:

Go go Power Rangers.

But if you really want to stand out in a crowd go as me, Homeless Dave, and wow all your friends as you spend the entire party explaining who I am. And what an easy costume too. Blue jeans and a black jacket. You can pick any shirt you want, and any shoes you want, because nobody knows what they really look like.