Unfollow This

I got unfollowed on Twitter again. No big deal - shit happens. But this person did at least DM (Direct Message) me and tell me why they unfollowed me on Twitter:

"I unfollowed you. Not because of you as a person but because you swear and cuss too much."

Fair enough. I have never held a gun to the head of anyone and said "You must follow me or I will kill you." Everyone that follows me on Twitter has followed me of their own free will. And everyone who has unfollowed me has also done so on their own free will.

But I got to thinking, and went back in my tweet archives (using http://backupmytweets.com/ because Twitter itself only lets you see your last 3,200 tweets) and lo and behold I found a tweet from the very same person when they first started following me. That one read:

"Love your blog thanks for allowing me to follow you."

As can be seen from the tweet there are two things which are apparent. Firstly, it was back in the day when my Twitter account was protected and people had to request to follow. Secondly, they followed me on Twitter because they had been reading my blog.

You have to bear in mind that the tweet when they started following me was back in December 2009. So I went back to my blog and thought maybe I went through a period of never cussing, or swearing, and that is when they started following me. No it didn't happen; actually back in December 2009 I was swearing like a trooper. Every other word was "fuck", "fucktard", or "cunt". And to be honest, most of my later posts on the blog have had a hell of a lot less cussing and swearing in them. At a quick guess I would estimate that me swearing and cussing has actually gone down by about 80%.

So this left me with the one question on my mind - Why did they unfollow me? It obviously wasn't the cussing as that has actually gone down from when they first started following me. Personally I don't care why they stopped following me on Twitter; but what I do wonder is why they lied.

Now this got me to thinking. It is a rare thing; but sometimes I do actually think before I write these posts. Why lie? Seriously, if you unfollow someone you don't have to tell them. But why would someone go to the lengths of sending a Direct Message which is a lie just before unfollowing you? Has the hoax on Twitter hit such low levels that now people need to lie before they unfollow you?

There is a guide for a successful unfollow. It is this:

1. Decide which person you no longer want to follow.
2. Unfollow them.

That is it. No long winded process. You were following them on Twitter; it wasn't some relationship. No need for an explanation.

And if you are the unfollowee (the person who was unfollowed) don't worry about it. No need to air your dirty laundry across the Twitter time-line with your pleas of "Why did you unfollow me?" Just let it go, because more than likely tomorrow you will have 2 new followers for one reason and another.

Which all leads me to the point I was thinking about before I actually started typing this post. Nobody is ever going to agree 100% with everyone else. Just never going to happen. You are never going to have Rabbi Shmuley admitting he is an asshole for releasing a book and you are never going to get Jermaine Jackson to admit that if he isn't making enough money he really needs to give up the entertainment business and get a real job.

And that is Twitter. It is like a miniature version of the planet. People of all different races, sexes, and religions all putting their 140 character opinions and thoughts out there. Nobody is expected to agree 100% just like real life.

So, without further ado, I would like to wish all those that have indeed unfollowed me a great life. Thanks for being part of the journey.

Twitter just needs to calm the fuck down. Each and everyone on there is just one person in a sea of people. If someone comments negatively about a tweet don't consider it an insult consider it the beginning of a debate.


Cuss Count: Medium

Legal Notice: None required for a change. My lawyer friend can breathe a sigh of relief that nothing needs to be checked. Hell I don't even have to mention "satire" to cover my ass.

Note: I just got through reading the post and it seems I may have gone a bit soft towards the end. Don't fucking worry about it. I'm still obnoxious, I'm still an asshole, and normal service will resume by the end of the week. And if you want an argumentative point - I'll say Michael Jackson is dead just to piss you off.


Anonymous said...

Well I've read your post and all I can honestly say is that I will NEVER unfollow you and you know why? Just because you seem to be the MOST reasonable person into this twitter-madness.
And......you are close to MJ for me.....I mean your sense of humor and everything.....
I dont mind your swearing coz we all do this from time to time so does MJ....
So....I love you and will always be here with you
Your fan lol

Anonymous said...

Poor Doggie...
Keeping bad is more difficult than keeping good. Ok we have to wait the weekend for the Doggie we knew coming back!

Anonymous said...

This gift is for your weekend coming back Doggie! Keep tough! Need you bad! (^-^)

Anonymous said...

You can't fool us. You're really a nice person. :-)

By the way, I just read "Courting Trouble" by Lisa Scottoline and it all seems very possible again.

Anonymous said...

IMO doggie wouldn't be doggie without all the cussing, so carry on cussing :)

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