Merry Fucking Christmas

Over at the Michael Jackson Death Hoax Investigators forum (aka Mo & Souza's forum, aka the NEW MJKit forum aka MJHD Redirect) Souza posts a welcome to:

• Silverfish (aka Fuckfish)
• Daydream (aka Nightmare)
• Biscuit (aka Goldielocks)
• Purple 7
• Starfox (aka Starfuck)
• KLHayes (aka LoveTheGlove aka ShoveTheGlove)

So everyone is now one big happy family again. What fucking Christmas spirits have you been drinking Souza? Have you been at Five's medicinal whiskey?

You are going to invite the same people that supported, and stood by, Amy when you were banned from MJHD? Which brings the question - was you even banned; or is that all part of this elaborate hoax that is being built up around the forums?

Finally the whole scenario is starting to make sense. Its like reading the plot outline of a Dan Brown novel; just when you think you are starting to understand everything the priest that everyone trusted turns out to be the Illuminati member.

The Plot

Act I

Auntie Amy starts a website on the hoaxed death of Michael Jackson even though later she will admit to not even being a fan. Also the creation date will be brought into question - either because it was created before the hoaxed death or Auntie Amy used some creative coding to ensure that it would look like it was.

Act II

Auntie Amy introduces, Wordpress, Paypal donations, and Google adsense. Due to the members joining not being as high as Auntie Amy had hoped for she starts to create members to create interest, drama, intrigue. Unfortunately some people get caught up in this produced hype and start believing that MJHD is bigger than Michael himself, believing that MJHD is the new center of the universe.

Act III

After a few randomly created members (JCC, PeterPanPYT etc etc etc) claim to know Michael, speak on his behalf, and create drama things start going wrong for Auntie Amy. All hell is breaking lose on the forum. Some people just don't believe all these crackheads claiming to be somehow connected to Michael. A new sub-plot starts to emerge.

Act IV

In the dark of night, huddled around computers, the new sub-plot is formulated, and tweaked until it is ready. It is a great plot, it is almost believable; had it not been for the fact that people were already questioning things. Action needed to be taken, and fast, and Auntie Amy introduces the feared ARMY OF MODERATORS. Their task is an easy one:

• Control the forum, do not allow people to wander off into their own theories.
• Ensure that the Illuminati do not get mentioned.
• If anyone questions my motives, or my reasoning, ban them instantly.
• Lock any topic which does not conform to the thinking of the Admin.

And so began the reign of the AMY'S ARMY.

Act V

The real members started to get pissed about their friends being banned, their own topics being locked or deleted, and things just not being right. Auntie Amy sensed this and to make sure the revolution did not happen, she banned Souza & Mo - not once but twice; just for dramatic effect. It proved to the members that were ready to revolt that nobody was safe; step out of line and you will be crushed by the fury of Auntie Amy.

Act VI

Many of the real members saw this not as a warning, but as a step too far. Anarchy broke out throughout MJHD. People were opening forums and blogs to express their anger, disbelief, feelings about the whole situation. Auntie Amy trembled in her piss-soaked diaper as she realized that she was slowly losing control of the members - she takes MJHD offline to punish them.

Act VII

MJKit is formed by Souza as a backup to MJHD. Just in case Auntie Amy loses it and takes MJHD down again. Members from MJHD start to leave for MJKit, preferring it's more relaxed style. As members leave, and traffic at the website goes down, Auntie Amy creates more and more fictitious members (like a mad scientist cloning in the hopes of creating a forum conquering army).

Act Act VIII

ThisIsAlsoIt is introduced. The sequel (that was never announced by Sony) would redirect people to MJHD then a whole host of other lame clues. This would be the saving grace, this would be Auntie Amy's golden goose, this would become so popular she wouldn't have time for MJHD. Auntie Amy, Fuckfish, Nightmare, and a few mods sit one night and create John Smith - the savior of the MJHD, who will give the members hope, and then crash their hopes along with the database.

Act IX

A new tyrant is unleashed upon MJHD. Fuckfish is somehow in all the confusion allowed to be the Admin of MJHD. Ruling with an iron fist he continues to ban topics, suggest that Michael Jackson is not sexy to the female members, and show photos of his greasy head on a blog. While Fuckfish is so busy protecting his greasy ass from all the hassle that he is creating the final plot starts to hatch. This one will be the Armageddon plot. This one will be the apocalypse of MJHD.

Act X

MJHD is put up for sale. Fuckfish being the fearless leader spills his guts on how it was all Auntie Amy's idea; and ultimately fault. He admits, in a last ditch attempt to save his own ass, that he lied to support Auntie Amy. ThisIsAlsoIt is rising in popularity, pointing to all that follow it that the Illuminati is the connection. Then just when things cannot get any worse they do. Badkolo buys MJHD and redirects it to Souza & Mo's forum; using the exact HTML that ThisIsAlsoIt uses. MJKit's new forum redirects to Mo & Souza's forum. The apocalypse is taking shape. A press release is released by MJHDConspiracy: "Believe in MJHD, MJkit, and Mo and Souza, because they hold all your forums now. They hold all your work, your thoughts, your ideas, and if you piss of one of these tyrants the MJ-Illuminati elite will ensure you never post on a forum again. V for Vendetta my ass. It is not taking a government over it is standing up for what you believe and ensuring your voice is heard. Ask questions, expect answers, and always look at the creation of these sites in the same way that you look at the hoaxed death."

Act XI - The final Act

Auntie Amy takes a bow, her work is done, she now has complete control. She now is sitting where she wants. She is in control, but no longer in the position where she is open for questioning. She smiles. She adjusts her diaper. As she leans away from her Mac computer she laughs an eerie laugh.

But it is not over, the acting, the illusions, the hoax within a hoax continues.

As my good friend Ebeneezer would say "Bah Humbug!"

Peace.