The Jurors Speak

With the weekend being the only time that the jurors, in the Conrad Murray trial, can actually take a break in thinking about the trial; it seemed like a great time to get them all in one room. The alcohol started flowing; and the jurors opened up.

Legal Notice: Details may have been fabricated, omitted, or altered for legal purposes. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

MJHDC: So how is deliberations going?
Juror 1: Not good, it is taking forever. Juror 5 had diarrhea on Friday and we ended up taking more breaks than necessary ...
Juror 5: Hey, not my fault. I still say it was the chicken from the court cafeteria that caused it.
Juror 8: Well I had the chicken and it didn't effect me in any way.
Juror 5: Aren't you just special then.
Juror 4: I had a bit of an icky stomach and I had the chicken.
Juror 9: The beef was fine.
MJHDC: OK. Back to the trial. How has the medical evidence played a part in your deliberations?
Juror 7: It didn't. Not in mine any way. They totally lost me. I don't know if it was 25mg or the whole bottle.
Juror 11: Yeah. It was hard to keep up with all the experts.
Juror 10: It wasn't what they were saying it was just how they were saying it.
Juror 2: I'll agree with that. It was bad enough listening to Walgren and Chernoff. And then these so-called experts got on the stand. I was just about ready to blow my own brains out.
Juror 12: Some it did seem a bit in-depth. And how we are meant to understand it all is just crazy.
Juror 3: Its all a fucking hoax. You know that?
MJHDC: Well it is a possibility; that is for sure. So Juror 3 you believe?
Juror 3: Of course. I'm here for the free lunches and a bit of free time away from work and the family. I have 5 kids. Any break I can get I take.
Juror 5: Well if you don't think Michael Jackson is dead how do you intend to come to a verdict.
Juror 3: Not guilty. Dumbass. Its obvious if MJ is alive then Murray is innocent.
MJHDC: So are you allowed to discuss if you have taken any votes yet?
Juror 12: We took a vote as soon as we went in the room. It was 4 for guilty and 7 for not guilty ...
MJHDC: That is only 11.
Juror 12: Well Juror 5 was in the bathroom and wouldn't shout his answer through the door.
MJHDC: I see. Is it still that way now you have had a day of deliberations?
Juror 4: We don't know. We haven't had a vote since.
MJHDC: Well how about now, a quick show of hands? All those that think Conrad Murray is guilty raise your hand. OK that is 3 of you.
Juror 6: What we voting on?
MJHDC: Whether you think Murray is guilty at the present moment.
Juror 6: Oh sorry. I thought it was about who had the chicken still. I don't think Murray is guilty.
Juror 5: Nice going Janice.
Juror 6: Tom I didn't think we were allowed to mention names.
Juror 5: I'm sure he'll edit all that out at the end.
MJHDC: Yeah. Sure; if I remember.
Juror 5: See.
Juror 6: OK then. Well I really liked how Walgren composed himself in the closing argument. If I wasn't a married woman ...
Juror 4: Janice you are not married.
Juror 6: Yes I am. Just because we have never met doesn't mean we can't be married.
Juror 5: Oh for fucks sake. Crazy bitch is never getting married. Lets be honest about it. She spent 15 minutes at lunch yesterday lining her garden peas up on her plate.
Juror 6: Well they did look neater. You know I hate mess.
Juror 5: Yeah you are the only one who took notes in chronological order. Me I just winged it and hoped I could copy off someone at the end.
MJHDC: Sticking to the trial. A lot has been said about Propofol. Anyone ever had it before?
Juror 3: Me. Had it when I came back from the Gulf.
MJHDC: So you was in the Gulf war?
Juror 3: No way. It was a vacation before all this war stuff kicked off. Anyway I drunkenly fell off the balcony at the hotel. Broke my arm and cracked 2 ribs; and had a major gash on my head. They did some exploratory surgery and then it was when I had the Propofol. Well I think it was Propofol it is all a bit hazy.
MJHDC: This discussion isn't breaking Judge Pastor's guidance of not discussing the trial is it?
Juror 12: I don't think so. We only get paid Monday to Friday. So I think as along as it is the weekend we are alright to talk about it.
Juror 9: Do we get a lunch break?
MJHDC: You have been here for 20 minutes. So no.
Juror 9: What about a break?
Juror 1: That has what it has been like all the time. We just start talking and someone wants to do something.
Juror 4: We might head over to Carolwood Drive on Monday. I think as the jury we can ask for little trips to look at the scene.
MJHDC: Sort of. If it is relevant I think you can.
Juror 4: See I told you we could.
MJHDC: I wouldn't take my answer as the final answer.
Juror 3: I'm taking a camera. The only believer on the jury. Be a feather in my cap so to speak.
Juror 6: You don't wear a cap.
Juror 3: It is a figure of speech.
Juror 7: What will we learn from seeing Michael Jackson's bedroom?
Juror 3: Who gives a shit. At least we will be there. I'm wearing my fedora on Monday just in case.
MJHDC: Finally, before I wrap this up, I'd like to ask each of you for your opinion on how the trial went.
Juror 1: I was bored through most of it. Most of my notes are covered in little doodles.
Juror 2: I'd rather not say.
Juror 3: Boring. Boring. And even more boredom. I know MJ is alive so why go through this show?
Juror 4: Its been pretty exciting compared to my normal work. I have 17 cats you know.
MJHDC: I'm sure you do.
Juror 5: At least I'm getting paid for sleeping. And I did get the phone number of Ms Brazil. Result.
Juror 6: I think it has been very enlightening and we are going to be diligent in our deliberations.
Juror 5: Sure we are. Heads he is guilty. Tails he is innocent.
Juror 7: I don't know right now what is going on. Someone shouted 'murderer' at me last night. I got scared.
MJHDC: So, people know who you all are then?
Juror 7: It is a bit obvious. We all leave court wearing our 'juror number badge' so it didn't take them too long to work it out.
Juror 8: He's guilty and I'm going to recommend lethal injection.
MJHDC: Thats not possible. He'll do a maximum of 4 years by California sentencing guidelines.
Juror 8: Well we might as well let him go with the other 30,000 criminals they are releasing then.
Juror 9: Is Lindsay Lohan going to jail? I'm not allowed to watch the news.
MJHDC: Maybe. After she has posed for Playboy. She'll be in overnight and out the next morning.
Juror 10: She's nothing but a skank ho. I'd rather see Betty Ford naked.
MJHDC: Betty Ford is dead.
Juror 10: You got a problem with that?
Juror 11: I'm hoping it all ends soon. I think I am getting sores on my butt from sitting so much. I don't know how the judge does it all the time.
Juror 12: I say we go back Monday and just say "Not guilty" and get it all over with. Aint nobody going to have him as a doctor now anyway.
MJHDC: True that.
Juror 5: Its a fucking hoax. I tried explaining the ambulance picture to you; and the whole Robert Earl Carter connection.
Juror 7: Not that again.
MJHDC: Well you obviously have more to talk about. So good luck on Monday. And about 3.30PM if you could make your announcement I have a little bet going. Thanks.

After this discussion had taken place the jurors all left for their own lives. For legal reasons Janice's real name of Susan, and Tom's real name of Jason, were never mentioned.